Asquire, or Saint Asquire T.S. Eliot Vicious, is the patron Saint of Fropless Children, and Co-Founder of The Kentucky Boys Clench (along with co-founders Rev Dr Lon, Rev. Justin Case (aka Dr. FuckFace) , and Rev. Country Bumpkin (killed mysteriously in a chemical fire).

He became ordained April 1st 1999, after being introduced to the Church by Dr. Lon with whom he survived The Hammer Incident in 2002.

With the Kentucky Boys, he made three pilgrimages to X-Day (4, 5, & 9).

Initially styling himself "Reverend Doktor Asquire" (which is heard in The Kentucky Boys Documentary), he abandoned these titles when made a Saint by Rev. Ivan Stang at X Day 4.

He was appointed Governor of Teenage Wasteland by Rocknar (The Governor of SportsLand) in 2003.

Since mid-2003 he has been a member of the Gay Teen Squad with Rev. Mary Magdalen, Cozmodiar, Saint Bucky, Rev. Alex, & LateBudieHollie.

He was famously neutral in the Domain Wars.

He is responsible for the Lon Death Hoax in 2005 and it's subsequent fallout.

He can be found occasionally operating within the Taphouse Cabal.

He has a "pretty high tolerance to heat"

Derided as an instigator and "hater" he seldom attacks anyone directly and avoids confrontation, favoring constant criticism - generally annoying everyone.

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