A simple Time Control device cleverly disguised as a normal clock... set the time to any time, and then that IS the time! Magic!
Time Control is one of the abilities possessed by every SubGenius (except for Bobbies), and it basically combines time travel with mind control, allowing every SubGenius to control time using their minds. This not only includes going forward and backwards in time, but also making time go faster or slower, pausing, rewinding, and switching between alternate timelines that lead to parallel universes.
This is why the SubGenius is capable of believing multiple contradictory ideas at the same time, and being RIGHT about all of them, because a SubGenius can actually visit other universes where each of their contradictory ideas is correct, or where they don't contradict each other. These alternate realities are connected by the Luck Plane, and through Time Control and Sales Magic, a SubGenius can surf the Luck Plane to end up in a different universe where all their wildest dreams come true.
Thus, for instance, the events of X-Day have many possible outcomes depending on how Time Control is used. In the original timeline, the world WILL end on July 5, 1998, which is in the future, but the Conspiracy changed the calendars so we don't know what year it is. However, through Time Control, there are alternate timelines, for instance one in which the year was upside down and X-Day won't happen until the year 8661, timelines in which Earth actually WAS destroyed but got switched around with Mars, and the Conspiracy's favorite timeline, in which X-Day came and went and the Pleasure Saucers and X-ists never showed up, and the whole Church of the SubGenius turned out to be a giant scam.
J. R. "Bob" Dobbs, the Living Slack Master, uses Time Control and Sales Magic to surf the Luck Plane more than anyone, which is why he is very rarely encountered in person in this universe, but why if you look at old footage of important events such as the J.F.K. assassination or the speech by Adolf Hitler in 1936 that was the first thing ever broadcast on television, you always catch a glimpse of him standing in the crowd, smoking a pipe full of frop with a huge grin on his face. The Church of the SubGenius also has extensive video archives of important events in the future where "Bob" is there, which were compiled by SubGenius filmmaker and future historian Rev. Ivan Stang into many videos and documentaries, such as the film Let's Visit the World of the Future.
Here is a video of the goddess Eris Discordia engaging in Time Control:
Here's another video where Rev. Sinphaltimus Exmortus uses Time Control to reverse the flow of time while smoking frop in his pipe:
