SubGenius Wikia Clench
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If you manipulate and lie to everyone around you to enrich yourself with Slack, and generally make a loud spectacle of yourself in doing so, then you fit the Pope profile. --Rev. Ivan Stang

I'm Pope Hildegard. As of 28 Juy 2015 I'm the adopter of this site, and am also an admin of Discordia Wiki. For anyone who cares, I am an ordained minister of the Church of the SubGenius (see below). I've written for various wikis, and co-wrote an independent SubGenius piece published in a magazine and am helping with a book.

I'm a mother with a son Carl who was adopted when I was a teenager and daughter Erisa and son Phillip who live with me. My sother is Fundament who's in the Marines.

I'm a founding member of Shamlicht Girls which merged with Shamlicht Boys to become Shamlicht Kids Club which is called Slackless Kids Club in Dobbstown, Malaysia. I was co-nestler with Sister Hooter of Nest of Pink Vipers (the original Shamlicht Girls) for several years. The story goes that Sister Hooter previously worked at a Home for Slackless Children.

I have a degree in journalism and write for and edit a small newspaper. I edit wikis because it lets me write things I could never write for the paper. I hope you enjoy what I write here!

SubGenius minister[]

Many years ago, I was given a Church of the SubGenius membership by my sother. I didn't know what the church was, so read about it. It looked to me like an excuse for my man to quit his job, commit acts of violence, and have sex with anyone and anything without caring about how any of this would affect me. Maybe you can understand why this did not fill me with great enthusiasm for the church. I don't remember if I tossed the membership packet or burned it. Maybe I made him eat it.

Years later, I got reintroduced to the church through Discordianism. This time, looking through eyes guided by Eris, I got it. I think.

As I understand it, I am still a SubGenius minister on the basis of that first paid membership. But I had no proof. Someone kindly gave me a gift membership so I would have proof. But as the giver didn't have their own membership and I technically did, I returned it. That led to many complications which are discussed in various posts in this website including Forum:Pope Hildegard & Miley Spears: Sockpuppets?.

Finally, in early 2017, I got a third membership packet. I filled that out and returned the enclosed card, so I am now on the Church record books under the name Pope Hildegard. I suppose this means that when the X-ists come, I'll have two seats on the Pleasure Saucer. Or three.

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